Is Overcommitting Your Fatal Flaw?

Always have far more to-dos than will ever fit in your day, week, and month? It’s a perennial state of being for me. I like to think it’s because of my broad interests, my myriad of friends, my thriving business. But when I dig deeper I find that I’ve always been this way, regardless of my circumstances – sometimes worse, sometimes better – but always, always stretched thin with tasks and responsibilities. If you find yourself in the same boat, maybe the same cause is in play for you: overcommitting. We overcommit usually because we want to please everyone or we want to avoid the conflict that comes with saying no. That’s me, coupled with a genuine interest in being of service to as many people as I can. What I’m reminding myself about every day is that it’s about quality, not quantity. It’s about doing Great Work, not Good Work (Michael Bungay Stanier’s fantastic book Do More Great Work spells it out for us).

I am learning to practice what I preach, along with Michael, in our Coaching for Great Work programs: Good work is good, but Great work is, well, really, really GREAT. It’s the work that sometimes doesn’t even feel like work, it feeds your soul, it makes a big difference, it’s what spurs you out of bed with exhilaration to get started. And more.

In order to have time for more and more Great Work, I just have to turn down some amount of Good Work. We talk about the skill of “saying ‘yes’ more slowly”. This works well for people like me, who have a wide streak of “I always want to please” running through me. I may not be able to say “no” outright, but I can suggest someone else who can probably help. I can set expectations of how long they’ll need to wait for my involvement. I can negotiate a tradeoff of another commitment for this new request.

And, yes, I’m working up to saying “no” – nicely, of course – to requests and work that just doesn’t make the Great Work cut anymore for me. How about you? What leads to your overcommitment these days? What do you do to lessen the stress? Your comments are welcomed!

RECIPE FOR DISASTER, WITH REVISIONS

So you wonder how some small businesses are weathering this economic debacle? Poorly, especially in regard to their human capital. Remember when the catch-phrase was “Our employees are our most valuable asset”? Many of the best small businesses embraced that ideal, and walked the talk. In the good old days (the 80s and 90s) it was easy. A true measure of a company is what it does when the going gets rough. The lesser companies have dropped their commitment to employees curb-side now that these painfully tough years are upon them. I encourage you to read the following as a cautionary tale, as a recipe for what not to do in these tough economic times.

I have been observing closely a small family-run business. This firm is not a client, and in my professional judgment, would rue any coaching from outsiders. Why am I so certain about that? As times have gotten tougher on its bottom line, anyone not related by blood –even long-term and faithful employees – have become villains. I watch from the sidelines as they both randomly and systematically employ the following “management” techniques:

1. DRY UP – standard and usual communication to employees, including any managers not in the family. Withhold important info that helps others serve the company’s clients because of a lack of trust in the staff.
2. DEMONIZE – good employees for the smallest misdeeds. Assume that no one is working, everyone is taking advantage. Overreact to any suggestions or input. Paranoia becomes the norm. There isn’t enough CYA in the world to keep individuals safe in this environment.
3. DEFLECT – any suggestions and assume any feedback is criticism. Shoot the messenger and publicly invite others in the company to the execution. Then wonder why the requests for “more effort, more commitment, more engagement” go unanswered.
4. DEMORALIZE – the workforce at all levels by painting a gloom and doom picture – every day, about every thing. Ask for greater sacrifice from all, then continue to arrive late, leave early. Refuse even small raises, cut salaries for management, while continuing to spend frivolously and visibly in the corporate offices.
5. DENY – ownership, culpability or involvement in anything negative that occurs in the company. Scape goat the responsibility to a lower level of management, because you can. Steal credit from them for anything that does go well.

I paint a grim picture. Sad to say, it’s all true. Not a fabrication and not an exaggeration. I marvel at this approach, by relatively intelligent people, as it is almost perfectly the antithesis of what defines good leadership and management. How great is their fear, their negativity, their hopelessness that they stoop to these tactics?

Our responses to adversity are the true test of our character. If I could coach this management team, where would I start? I would challenge them to:

1. LEAD instead of micro-managing
2. SHARE the good times and bad
3. COMMUICATE the information that will bring other employees to the table
4. TRUST the goodwill and intentions of their workforce
5. INNOVATE and try something different
6. REWARD people in creative ways for their efforts, their ideas and their continued energy.

In short, tough times like these call for LEADERS who will not shrink, but who will GO BIG – first and foremost for their people. With a dedicated, committed workforce – one that is treated fairly and with respect – the leadership can enter the work world fray with a great army on its side.

My family, with our family business being a farm, believes that you reap what you sow. A fancier term for this is self-fulfilling prophecy. Treating your employees like bums… makes bums. How long will this company last using these tactics? I’ll keep you posted. Do I hold much hope for the company’s sustainability? I’m hoping the last one out remembers to turn off the lights.

For more info about this topic, stop by http://LEAPLeadershipAdvantage.com and get a copy of my free report: LEADING NOW: How to Stand Out as a Leader in these Unusual Times. Comments welcomed always!

SNOW AND THE GENERATIONS

Having been blasted by endless snow storms (like most of the East Coast) for days on end, I’ve been busy watching out the window, checking out the action in the neighborhood. Here’s what caught my attention: there are various approaches to the business of snow removal. As a keen observer of human nature (that’s what we coaches do) I have seen some clearly discernable differences among the generations as they deal with several feet of the white stuff showing up on their doorsteps. Here’s what I’ve seen so far:

The Silents (b. 1925-1945) – Their answer to the snow is mano a mano. It’s important to get a path cleared. It’s personal. It’s about overpowering Mother Nature’s hold on us. They are out there with shovels and every other form of hand tool, making their mark on the white landscape. Like so many other tough conflicts over the decades, they will respond, put a shoulder to the wheel, and persevere until the job is done. We can only hope the cardiac specialists are available if needed.

Baby Boomers (b.1946-1964) – They may get all blissy about the beauty of the snowfall and the individualism of each snowflake. But when it comes to snow removal, the Boomers are all about the big power that comes from BIG toys. They bring the giant tractors – Kubotas and Deeres – to the party, and these bad boys are packing industrial snow blowers that easily put your front yard snow over the house and into your backyard. Comfortably sitting inside heated cabs with stereo and drink holders, the Boomer crowd takes snow manipulation from passion to obsession.

Gen-X (b.1965-1980) – Whatever. Snow is a total pain, best handled by someone else. The complaints are many, the action is slight. I have seen representatives of this group slog through the snow in expensive sneakers – and also arrive coatless in single digit weather. They have more trouble seeing the snowfall as anything but an inconvenience in their very busy lives, and wish that someone else would just make it stop. Now.

The Millennials (b.1981 to 2000) — Similarly inconvenienced by the snow as the Gen-Xers, this generation, the first to come of age in the new millennium, looks for ways to plan themselves out of future snow events. They are watching the weather reports on every available technology in order to get advanced notice of the next big storm. They want to be ready, to have a plan to minimize the disruption in their lives. I have seen them shoveling some, with iPods as accessories. They speak longingly about acquiring a walk-behind snow blower for use on the sidewalks in front of their new townhomes.

So that’s what is happening in my part of the world, on another cold and snowy night. Does the action in your neighborhood measure up? Same or different? Would love to hear your thoughts….

 

 

 

Hello world!

Hello World indeed!  Over the coming months and years I will be blogging here about life as a Professional Business Coach and Mentor — specializing in the areas of emotional intelligence, type preferences, how to build relationships you can count on — out there in the wonderful (and wicked) world of work.  I have some particular interests these days in generational differences — and in how the most recent brain research is, and should be, informing our work with others.  More about that will also be here.

I’m hoping that others will join me in this dialogue.  There will be tips and questions, surveys and wonderings.  Let’s share our thinking, okay?  Looking forward to a great conversation!